I remember when I first started exploring the concept of the ego. I’d read many things about how we must ‘dissolve’, ‘remove’ or even ‘kill’ the ego, which made me think of people running at themselves in the mirror waving pitchforks in the air.
Even with the limited understanding I had then this seemed odd, if the ego is truly a part of us then why would we want to kill it? Why would we want to kill something which millions of years of evolution has deemed is necessary for us to have?
As my inquiry deepened I came to see the essential role the ego plays, it is the part of us that keeps an eye on certain things which, for me at least, are the more mundane aspects of life. It is kind of like an inner admin system, running constant checks to ensure we are adhering to a best practice which we have developed over a lifetime of learning.
I see the ego as being like a puppy, if you leave it untrained it will chew up everything and s**t everywhere, but once it is trained it becomes a totally loyal friend, the best friend we can ever have. Training it to understand what truly serves the Self can be a big job, but that is such a great investment of time and energy.
In my experience the problem is that when untrained the ego becomes obsessive about things and after some time takes over, which leads us to act inauthentically, and in the more extreme situations we can lose connection to our Self altogether.
Furthermore I realised that my ego had been trained by other people, society and cultural expectation, meaning it had been programmed to keep me confirming with society rather keep me happy.
During a deep Ayahuasca ceremony recently I found my ego freaking out, shouting “run, run run!!”. There was an amusing moment when my authentic Self responded with, “Hey shut up you, your job is to make sure my hair looks good while I focus on the more important things!”, which amused me no end.
After the amusement passed I found great insight in that momentary exchange, and also a deeper appreciation for my ego. How amazing it is to have this wonderful piece of technology, evolved over millions of years of tweaks and improvements solely to take care of the more mundane aspects of life so that my authentic Self can be left to focus on the more important, joyous and loving aspects.
The work we do with plant medicine, and other powerful tools, in the Pineal Tribe has allowed me to explore altered states of reality and perception, affording me an opportunity to observe the inner workings of a Human Being and understand the beautiful symbiotic synergy we all have within.
So I raise a glass to my best friend in the world, the one who will always be with me and the one who I know always has my back. Ego you’re awesome. You’re a welcome companion on any journey I take, I’ll just make sure I am always in the drivers seat.